Cousin Love/Mairrages

Posted: 18 years ago
Before concluding any thing we should never ignore facts and sentiments which are lying within.
In words of Charles Darwin & Emma Wedgewood: A Cousin Couple

"When the principles of breeding and of inheritance are better understood, we shall not hear ignorant members of our legislature rejecting with scorn a plan for ascertaining by an easy method whether or not consanguineous marriages are injurious to man."

~ Charles Darwin. (1871)

Some people are fixated on the fallacy that cousin couples pose an intolerable risk to their offspring. However it is likely that we are all descendants of cousin marriages. Before civil laws banning cousin marriages, it was preferable to marry a cousin in some communities as it is to this day in many countries. The notion "why marry a stranger is just as prevalent in many countries as the cousin marriage taboo in America today. There is a wide range of opinions on the subject of cousin marriages. This is fuelled by erroneous information, bigotry, and presumptions. Further we have civil laws and religious creeds based on obsolete information.

The facts about cousin marriages are much clearer.

Fears of cousins who marry having children with birth defects are exaggerated. Simply marrying within your own race increases the odds of birth defects. Marrying within your own town further increases your chances. Cousin couples have only a slightly higher incidence of birth defects than non-related couples.

1. No European country prohibits marriage between first cousins. It is also legal throughout Canada and Mexico to marry your cousin. The U.S. is the only western country with cousin marriage restrictions

2. Children of non-related couples have a 2-3% risk of birth defects, as opposed to first cousins having a 4-6% risk. Genetic counseling is available for those couples that may be at a special risk for birth defects (e.g. You have a defect that runs in your family) In plain terms first cousins have at a 94 percent + chance of having healthy children. Check the links section for more information on genetic counselors. The National Society of Genetic Counselors estimated the increased risk for first cousins is between 1.7 to 2.8 percent, or about the same a any woman over 40 years of age.

3. Second cousins have little, if any increased chance of having children with birth defects, per the book "Clinical Genetics Handbook"– courtesy of the March of Dimes.

4. The frequency of cousin marriages in the USA is about 1 in 1,000. The frequency of cousin marriages in Japan is about 4 in 1,000

5. It is estimated that 20 percent of all couples worldwide are first cousins. It is also estimated that 80 percent of all marriages historically have been between first cousins!

6. In some cultures, the term cousin and mate are synonymous.

7. Albert Einstein married his first cousin. And so did Charles Darwin, who had exceptional children.

8. Franklin D. Roosevelt, the longest serving US president in history married his cousin (not a first cousin, however they shared the same last name).

9. Leviticus 18 lists all forbidden sexual relationships. Cousin relationships are not included.

10. Current studies indicate that cousin couples have a lower ratio of miscarriages -- perhaps because body chemistry of cousins is more similar. The verdict is still out.

11.  We are all cousins. No two people are more distantly related than 50th cousins

12. Acording to hindu Marriage act (INDIA) , a person can not marry upto his second cousin from the mother's side and upto his fourth cousin from the side of the father.(www.helplinelaw.com/docs/main.php3?id=HIMA3)

13. There is no bar in marrying 1st cousin as per The Christian Marriage Act. The prohibited degrees are not indicated or mentioned in the Christian Marriage Act.

14. Marriage between close relatives is not valid under Hindu law in general, but if there exists a practise in community ,marrying  first cousin on the father's side, then it would be valid. (http://www.bharatmatrimony.com/consult/legal/legalnov152004 .html)

15. Medically this matter is over rated. Please see follwoing medical report:-

      http://www.washington.edu/newsroom/news/2002archive/04-02arc hive/k040302a.html
        
16. Many cousin couples are happily living with fully healthy child and a happy life. Please see following :-
                

www.cousincouples.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl?board=general

                        
                These are some facts. No wise person can deny this fact. If you take a secret survey you will come up with a shocking results. You look at magzines, news papers there always some in problem of loosing some one who love due to some old outdated rules and people's mindset. Not every one can say NO. People say that wrong thing may happens when marrying cousins. Well wrong thing can also happen when marrying others. That's why we have divorces.  Myths are never facts. There are some socies which think even a love marriage is crime. Loving is crime. Times are chnaging now
       I don't think anything is wrong with loving your first or more distant cousin. In fact, we think the combination of this special intimacy and romance often make for a strong, beautiful, intimate, loving and extraordinary relationship.


1. Information on Genetics (point nuber #11 and #13) http://www.genetics.com.au/factsheet/default.htm


Resources

http://groups.google.com/group/indian-cousin-lovers

 
Edited by harrydeo - 17 years ago
Posted: 18 years ago
Then i suppose you can say brother - sisters born of the same parent can marry each other too !!!As per your research and logic !!
Posted: 18 years ago
Well, definitely in some regions of India cousins are known to marry each other per Hindu Law. It is legal and it is common even today.There are many reasons for having encouraged this to happen more for societal than scientific reasons. I don't see a problem with it.

I dont see how or why the government should interfere in anyone's bedroom at all. Allow people to make their own personal decisions, whoever they want to be with, marreid or not. People who make the decision eventually reap the benefit or pay the cost,not the president.
Posted: 18 years ago
Originally posted by indygirl


Then i suppose you can say brother - sisters born of the same parent can marry each other too !!!As per your research and logic !!


First let me clear you cousins are not brother and sisters. Brother and sisters never fall in love with each other but cousins do. Do a little local research you will come to know the fact. See counsiling coulmns in magazines and on internet, cousins fall in love.     Relating it with brother and sister is wrong.
Posted: 18 years ago
Originally posted by harrydeo




First let me clear you cousins are not brother and sisters. Brother and sisters never fall in love with each other but cousins do. Do a little local research you will come to know the fact. See counsiling coulmns in magazines and on internet, cousins fall in love.     Relating it with brother and sister is wrong.


Firstly cousins are also brothers and sisters . (Genetically and relationship wise)

Secondly , there are enough cases of brother - sisters falling in love too !!So why is it wrong ? How is it different ?

 If you read local magazines , you will read about, "incest " letters that mention that mother and son having an affair , or father and daughter having an affair . If cousins ( who are brother - sisters , genetically ). So why not brother - sisters of the same parent , or parent child?????!!??
Posted: 18 years ago
personally i find this practice horrendous.

in india cousin marriages are still common. among some south/north indian and marathi hindu communities, marriages are allowed between cross cousins (like dad's sister's son/daughter or mom's brother's son/daughter) and many muslim and parsis (zoroastrian) allow parallel(like dad's brother's son/daughter) as well as cross cousin weddings. a marriage between an uncle and a niece is also permissible in some jew and hindu communities.  

our ancestors had their reasons to do it. inbreeding was vastly acceptible then to keep the family fortunes intact. do we need to continue what our ancestors did?

Posted: 18 years ago
Originally posted by indygirl




Firstly cousins are also brothers and sisters . (Genetically and relationship wise)

Secondly , there are enough cases of brother - sisters falling in love too !!So why is it wrong ? How is it different ?

 If you read local magazines , you will read about, "incest " letters that mention that mother and son having an affair , or father and daughter having an affair . If cousins ( who are brother - sisters , genetically ). So why not brother - sisters of the same parent , or parent child?????!!??


It is just compairing it with incest for wrong reasons. Do you have any prevoious cases where mother and son having an affair , or father and daughter having an affair ???????   THese are just into some cheep stories that's it. No one aggrees with the mentioned relationship.
         No body was practicing this in history and neither we have laws for it. But we have histroy for cousin mairrages and laws supporting the same. Cousin are cousin.
Posted: 18 years ago
(Shakes head with total disapproval)
I come from a community which permits, no in fact encourages these types of marriages. And let me tell u, onw thing u have to be in it to know the problems with it. To begin with it raises the issue of family politics to a new high. And while perhaps our ancestors indulged in it to keep property within the family and also to ensure that the aged had proper care (u would scarecly ill treat u'r mom in law if she was also u'r aunt) there is no earthly reason for carrying it on now. Communities that practice cousin marriage experience higher levels of some very rare but very serious illnesses - illnesses known as recessive genetic disorders.Recessive genetic disorders are caused by variant genes. There are hundreds of different recessive genetic disorders, many associated with severe disability and sometimes early death, and each caused by a different variant gene. We all have two copies of every gene. If you inherit one variant gene you will not fall ill.If, however, a child inherits a copy of the same variant gene from each of its parents it will develop one of these illnesses.

All this is from scientific view point, now let us come to the social problems. If one is seen talking to ones cousin it is immediately assumed that one is having an affair! And even after marriage spouses both male and female tend to be suspicious and even jealous of the others cousins, thus souring family relations. Another problem is that in this marriage one doesnt know if the person one is marrying is just one cousin only. for eg take the case of this couple( i know the girl personally)
mr. a marries ms.b. and have a child C(boy). at the same time mr.a's sister ms.x married ms.b's uncle mr.y and had a child Z (girl). now encouraged by the family they proceed to get married. now look at this on one side Z is C's cousin but on the other side she is his aunt!

Also know of so many couple whose kids are born with rare diseases thanks to this practice. in fact over pediatricians often first ask if the child is born of a consangiunous marriage. Worst of all as family is always for it young people dont even look at other options! Girls as young as 10 and eleven will tell u that their cousin is their fiance.

It is not a healthy practice at all and let people not give flimsy theories to indulge in it .
Posted: 18 years ago
Originally posted by harrydeo



It is just compairing it with incest for wrong reasons. Do you have any prevoious cases where mother and son having an affair , or father and daughter having an affair ???????   THese are just into some cheep stories that's it. No one aggrees with the mentioned relationship.
         No body was practicing this in history and neither we have laws for it. But we have histroy for cousin mairrages and laws supporting the same. Cousin are cousin.


Having a sexual relationship with cousins is as incestous as having a sexual relationship with your parent or same parent brother - sister. There are enough cases of mother-son , father- daughter having an affair . I can cite them from news reports if you wish .I can recall one man in the news who had been breeding within his family very rapidly .....with his own daughters.......some were too young or say it was seen as illegal .
Let me try and find you THAT story and some others . Since these have a lot more shock value than cousins having an affair, you may not have marriages like with cousins .....but affairs certainly . Cousins are your brother - sister geneticaly and socially !!
Edited by indygirl - 18 years ago
Posted: 18 years ago
The stream of thinking, about incest, brother or sister, cousin or not, mother father uncles and aunt is all valid scientifically. "morally" too, whatever that means.

All is well when one makes the decision themselves and argues with oneself and their families about the choice.
However stupid the choice might seem and however dangerous it might end up, it still does not discount the fact that it must be made by the individual with or without anyone else's counsel. I am of the view that the government should not interfere about marital or one's sexual choices/preferences. My opinion only-

Related Topics

doc-text Topics pencil Author stackexchange Replies eye Views clock Last Post Reply
One Sided love vs two sided love

pencil Jashangrewal28   stackexchange 11   eye 1978

Jashangrewal28 11 1978 4 months ago Jashangrewal28
Does Love Jihad exist?

pencil NathuPaapi   stackexchange 7   eye 2169

NathuPaapi 7 2169 4 months ago Palak2812

Topic Info

19 Participants 51 Replies 47482Views

Topic started by harrydeo

Last replied by Aparna_BD

loader
loader
up-open TOP