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xx 2013 N e W Y e A R b a S H xx - IMP Pg2 - Page 3

aartipartyy thumbnail
Posted: 11 years ago
thanks guys ðŸ¤—
i'm gonna edit mines soon 

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..-Jia-.. thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
I will post later tonight. Just got my WA messages. Will read page 2 and get back to you all.
..-Jia-.. thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago

Hi girls!


Before reading my post, know that my post is just my opinions, my thoughts, observations, etc. Neither am I influenced by anyone's words, nor am I biased. What I see is right is right, or what I see is wrong is wrong. I don't run with the majority, or minority.

 

I didn't start the dP family,but I am the eldest so I will talk to you guys like you are my little sisters. I love you girls like you are my younger sisters. I don't have favorites, and I do not love one more than the other because in my eyes you guys are equal. Never have I treated you guys differently. If I did, then PM me, message me and we will talk about it personally. However, yes, there are members that I talk to more often because of WhatsApp or texting, but that doesn't mean I love the other members any less and that doesn't mean the people that I do interact with more have influenced me. I don't listen to one side of the story and not grasp the other side. People who do that, may God help them.

 

Family? Let me provide you all a definition – a group of people united by a common affiliation. Hmmm girls do we even act like a family? Nahi, na? We all like to have a great time together, that is our motto, haina? We don't act like a family yet when Vanshika posted that she will close down this CC, we all decide to cry for help. Hmm weird. Some questions I have to ask you all; why have we decided to stop talking to each other? Why have we started to talk behind others back? Why have we taken matters in our own hand and decide to bash others and degrade one another? Why are dPians' names being erased from the list without talking to the clueless other members? And today, I am ashamed to call myself a dPian. Didn't expect this at all.

 

I don't know what has happened over the past couple of weeks other than what you guys have told me. To be honest, all I have notice is some changes in the dPians. The dPians got divided. After Jen's exit, it was Vanshika, Jasman, and Damini. You three were always together. I  haven't seen Aarti in a while nor talk to her that much. And then next I know Asha is out of the dP family, on here and on fB. Um explanations girls? And I am serious, I want to know what happened to Asha. 7 months of beautiful friendship got turned into utter crap. Division of members, member's names are erased – aren't we acting like kids here? No? Reality hasn't hit any of you guys yet because I see a lot of childish acts here.

 

Majority of you are adults so act like adults. Mini and Aarti, you guys are the youngster in the family, but either take my advice or leave it. If you guys don't like something about a person, confront that person. Don't be a coward and go against them. If you guys wanted to involve someone, you could have talked to me. I am not biased. I don't side with anyone. I don't know how many times I have told each and everyone here that whenever you need a pair of ears, I am always available. Just say the word. I can help. I won't get involved but I can help you sort out your differences. It would be better if there was mediator instead of a fiasco like we are dealing with. And please stop making accusations. That is a coward act. You have no other way to defend yourself, so you go making accusations about other people just so that you can have people support you. Please, that is childish. Refer to the first sentence of this paragraph. Get it? One more thing: we are a family, then why can't we trust each other? I trusted you all. What is the problem then? Do we not like each other? I think that may be one of the problems.  

 

I am not perfect nor do I say I am, but if you have a problem with me or in the near future ever do have a problem with me, talk to me instead of going behind my back and talking about me, because I am damn sure you all wouldn't like if someone goes behind your back and talks crap. Ever heard the quote, treat someone the way you want to be treated? And if you all think I may have been avoiding any of you, then please get your facts right. The past couple of weeks have been hectic for me with finals and graduation, then post-graduation.

 

If none of you liked what I wrote or said, or if I hurt you in anyway, then I am sorry. In order for this CC to stay, everyone needs a wakeup call. This post was for everyone in the dP family. There are some issues I would like to deal with some of the members individually and I will do that in my own time and that too privately.

 

New Years is just around the corner, and I would hate to start the New Year on a bad note.

 

Cheers!

Mohabbateinn thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
 Asha has not been in touch with me for the longest time.. and on her part, there has been no effort to talk to me. Because of one member, she decided to walk away from the group... When I talked to Asha.. I told her that now no one can blame you for anything... but instead of staying.. she decided to leave.. regardless of my assurance to her. 

I am very upset with whoever went to Jenny with my post on facebook because that was private to me.. and my trust has been broken..  Jenny wrote many hurtful things for Jas, Mini and I... but us three were trying to end the matter privately. However, Asha worked as an "enabler" .. and was posting the links to Jen's message around.. instead of trying to help us. It hurts for me to know that Asha and Aarti are able to confide in Jenny rather than me.

dP was always made of everyone as one. However, many of you decided to stop posting on that CC. Apart from me, only Jas and Mini were actively posting. The groups were formed behind our backs... I came to know only 2 days back that things were being said behind our backs. 

I'm not in touch with anyone outside of IF... maybe that is why people think it is okay to talk bad about someone. 

Like they say..it takes two hands to clap -- for matters to get better, both sides need to make the effort. I have lived my side of the friendship long enough, but if it still falls short for some.. I don't know how I can be of any help to you now. 
LD-Radha thumbnail
Anniversary 13 Thumbnail Group Promotion 6 Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 11 years ago
Since Jia is the only one who stated her opinions here so far, I'd like to respond to them in a separate message.

But first I want to clear a concern that I've heard before as well. Since Jia is the one who mentioned it here, I will refer to hers. Jia stated that after Jen left, it seemed like Vanshika, Damini and I formed our own group. I want to object to this and I'll tell you why.

If we look at the first CC to this point, arguably who has been the most active? Vanshika, Damini, Jen and I. Note:This is NOT accusing anybody of ANYTHING. I know everyone has different schedules, in some cases different time zones and everyone makes an effort to come on whenever they are free. But with Jen gone, that leaves the three of us. We never spoke ill of anyone, ganged up on anyone or talked about anyone behind their backs. Whenever anyone else was free and came on the CC, we welcomed them back with open arms. BECAUSE WE LOVE EVERYONE.

Let me say that one more time.

WE. LOVE. EVERYONE.

Last time.

WE. LOVE. EVERYONE.

And I can say with assurance that Damini and Vanshika feel the same way. This CC has not, is not and will not be just for the three of us. I know everyone has different means of communicating. For example, some of us talk via facebook or whatsapp but if you come on the CC you will mostly find the three of us, two of the three of us or one of us posting. Not because we have formed our own group but because its our easiest way of communicating. If you guys saw the amount that I talk to Sneha on whatsapp would you say that we have our own group? NO. Its our way of communicating because it is easier for her to whatsapp. Just like its easier for Vanshika, Damini and I to talk to each other on the CC.

If you ever have any doubt, refer to underlined.

Side note: I'm sorry for using your example Sneha, I thought it was appropriate for the context. It wont happen again.

WOAH. That turned out way too long 😆

Edited by eternal_music - 11 years ago
..-Jia-.. thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
@Vanshika: I told you in my post, I know what you all told me and nothing more. What Asha did or whatever she said or did, I have no idea, so I can't say anything more. That goes to my point which I wrote in my post, why don't you confront that person? If things are being said behind your backs then it is easier to confront that person instead of keeping it in. I was awarded Miss Least Active of the CC. I hardly post in the CC. I don't even post on the fB one as well. Why Aarti, Sneha didn't come, I don't know. Like I said I don't talk to Aarti as much as I would like to but I am telling you what I observed and I thought you three got more closer. That is all. Sneha and I talked on WhatsApp and she was as clueless as I was to what is happening in the CC. That is why I wrote that I felt that you three formed a group.

@Jas: Ok! I am sorry. I forgot that you three were the most active there. This goes to my next point: so why did you stop messaging me on WhatsApp? That was our form of communication as well.The last time, I was the one to message you and I asked for forgiveness because I thought I had done something wrong that might have hurt you. Then you told me you didn't have time and I would know this better. Yet you had time to skype or oovoo or WhatsApp others. 😕

This is getting way out of proportion. But Vanshi you said that this CC is our battle ground. Everything needs to be sorted out now.
LD-Radha thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
This content was originally posted by: ..-Jia-..


@Jas: Ok! I am sorry. I forgot that you three were the most active there. This goes to my next point: so why did you stop messaging me on WhatsApp? That was our form of communication as well.The last time, I was the one to message you and I asked for forgiveness because I thought I had done something wrong that might have hurt you. Then you told me you didn't have time and I would know this better. Yet you had time to skype or oovoo or WhatsApp others. 😕

This is getting way out of proportion. But Vanshi you said that this CC is our battle ground. Everything needs to be sorted out now.


Now we're getting to the heart of the matter! And I appreciate you bringing it up. 

In the same message, I also said the same thing that I have told everyone else since Day 1. That we are a family and that nothing can change that. I made it clear that you have done nothing wrong and that it was hectic for me at the time as I'm sure it was for you with uni coming to an end. At that point in time, I didnt skype, oovoo or whatsapp others. There was a misunderstanding with Asha that I was involved in for a day but other than that my communication to my OWN PARENTS was minimal. Point being, for that time period, I didnt stop communicating with one person. I pretty much kept everyone to a minimal and I tried to make that known to everyone. 

But even after that message, you didnt reply to me. I didnt know whether or not to think something was wrong and I knew you were busy so I left it to clear up for a later time. I apologize if I hurt you in any way. That was not at all my intention.
LD-Radha thumbnail
Anniversary 13 Thumbnail Group Promotion 6 Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 11 years ago
- Like I said, Jia has been the one to voice her opinions here thus far and therefore, I'd like to respond to them. Hopefully it clears some misconceptions or unanswered questions.

Hi girls!


Before reading my post, know that my post is just my opinions, my thoughts, observations, etc. Neither am I influenced by anyone's words, nor am I biased. What I see is right is right, or what I see is wrong is wrong. I don't run with the majority, or minority.

 

I didn't start the dP family,but I am the eldest so I will talk to you guys like you are my little sisters. I love you girls like you are my younger sisters. I don't have favorites, and I do not love one more than the other because in my eyes you guys are equal. Never have I treated you guys differently. If I did, then PM me, message me and we will talk about it personally. However, yes, there are members that I talk to more often because of WhatsApp or texting, but that doesn't mean I love the other members any less and that doesn't mean the people that I do interact with more have influenced me. I don't listen to one side of the story and not grasp the other side. People who do that, may God help them.

 

Family? Let me provide you all a definition ' a group of people united by a common affiliation. Hmmm girls do we even act like a family? Nahi, na? We all like to have a great time together, that is our motto, haina? We don't act like a family yet when Vanshika posted that she will close down this CC, we all decide to cry for help. Hmm weird. Some questions I have to ask you all; why have we decided to stop talking to each other? Why have we started to talk behind others back? Why have we taken matters in our own hand and decide to bash others and degrade one another? Why are dPians' names being erased from the list without talking to the clueless other members? And today, I am ashamed to call myself a dPian. Didn't expect this at all.

- I know this is regarding something later in the post but it fits in here too. Jia says we have been acting childish. I openly admit to acting like a child. Because being an adult, I am a child. I've always known that. But do you guys know what my childish definition of a family is? (Since Jia has shared hers.) A group of people that LOVE each other. And I love each and every one of you. Even real families have arguments at some point or another, that doesnt mean they dont love each other. 

- In response to "when Vanshika posted that she will close down this CC, we all decide to cry for help. Hmm weird." I think some of us werent even aware that there were certain problems existing. When Vanshika posted the message, I was surprised at first. Its only when I asked her that she shared with me that there is some tension. Thats when I had the knowledge that there were problems and thats when I decided to go mend them. Had I known before and had the time, I would have acted sooner.

- I cant answer all of Jia's questions but I know that we all haven't stopped talking to one another. We have been busy with school/uni/friends/family. Especially with the holidays, it becomes a busy time of year. I mean, I have a cousin in India. I have not talked to him and several months now because hes been busy with work and myself with uni. I still love him with all my heart and soul, and thats never going to change. Same with dPs. If I dont talk to someone for a certain length of time, I dont love them any less. Including you Jia. 

I don't know what has happened over the past couple of weeks other than what you guys have told me. To be honest, all I have notice is some changes in the dPians. The dPians got divided. After Jen's exit, it was Vanshika, Jasman, and Damini. You three were always together. I  haven't seen Aarti in a while nor talk to her that much. And then next I know Asha is out of the dP family, on here and on fB. Um explanations girls? And I am serious, I want to know what happened to Asha. 7 months of beautiful friendship got turned into utter crap. Division of members, member's names are erased ' aren't we acting like kids here? No? Reality hasn't hit any of you guys yet because I see a lot of childish acts here.

- This concern I addressed in my last message so I won't do it again. From what I understand about Asha, there was a misunderstanding and is in progress to be mended. 

Majority of you are adults so act like adults. Mini and Aarti, you guys are the youngster in the family, but either take my advice or leave it. If you guys don't like something about a person, confront that person. Don't be a coward and go against them. If you guys wanted to involve someone, you could have talked to me. I am not biased. I don't side with anyone. I don't know how many times I have told each and everyone here that whenever you need a pair of ears, I am always available. Just say the word. I can help. I won't get involved but I can help you sort out your differences. It would be better if there was mediator instead of a fiasco like we are dealing with. And please stop making accusations. That is a coward act. You have no other way to defend yourself, so you go making accusations about other people just so that you can have people support you. Please, that is childish. Refer to the first sentence of this paragraph. Get it? One more thing: we are a family, then why can't we trust each other? I trusted you all. What is the problem then? Do we not like each other? I think that may be one of the problems.  

- I cant speak for everyone but I myself have trusted everyone and loved everyone. I think I've said that enough times by now. 

I am not perfect nor do I say I am, but if you have a problem with me or in the near future ever do have a problem with me, talk to me instead of going behind my back and talking about me, because I am damn sure you all wouldn't like if someone goes behind your back and talks crap. Ever heard the quote, treat someone the way you want to be treated? And if you all think I may have been avoiding any of you, then please get your facts right. The past couple of weeks have been hectic for me with finals and graduation, then post-graduation.


If none of you liked what I wrote or said, or if I hurt you in anyway, then I am sorry. In order for this CC to stay, everyone needs a wakeup call. This post was for everyone in the dP family. There are some issues I would like to deal with some of the members individually and I will do that in my own time and that too privately.

 

New Years is just around the corner, and I would hate to start the New Year on a bad note.

- I see Jia's also on board. So lets make this a good, fresh start to the New Years for EVERYONE.

Cheers!


Edited by eternal_music - 11 years ago
VarunKiBiwi thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
I hope everything becomes well and i am speechless with all this...
Sorry for short reply
*~sneha~* thumbnail
Posted: 11 years ago
Hey everyone !!
 
After i read jia,vanshu and jasu's posts i just felt like i needed to post my views on this whole thing as well.
I know i'm not exactly an active member here..because i hardly get the time to come on the CC.
So,basically i only talk to jas and jia through whatsapp because thats easier for me.
 
But that doesnt mean i dont love each one of you,because i do.
I still have no idea what happened with asha and why she suddenly wasnt a part of dP anymore.
I have a slight idea about jen thing but i believe that was something that did get sorted out (Between jen and vanshika,that is)
 
I cant say that i completely agree with everything that jia has posted,but there are a LOT of things that i do agree with.
Like how we are a family.and we should seriously start acting like that.
 
@Vanshu:One thing about being a family is that we discuss EVERYTHING openly.When i said you guys are family,i seriously meant it.
And for me family are those people that i can tell if something is bothering or if someone has done something that i feel wasnt right or someone did something that hurt me.
So,i honestly feel its better if you just tell everyone what the root of the problem is ..and who you think said anything about you,behind your back. Maybe if you tell everyone,it'll be easier to sort things out.
 
I'd just like the say that i've never ever had a problem with anyone and i love you all.I know i dont come on the CC as much but during the semester,its pretty hard to come on.There are a lot of assignments and also there's the time difference thing.
 
I just hope whatever it is,we can sort it out.I wouldn't any of this to end.Not on a bad note,anyway <3