Part 15
Kunal remembered his
conversation with Sidhi.
"So you don't love me.
Nobody loves me. And I do not deserve to live"
Fear gripped Kunal. What
if...
Kunal: Seema, look for
Sidhi.
Seema: What happened Kunal
bhaiya? What did you talk to her about? Where did she go?
Kunal: I don't know. She
believes I don't trust her. She said she didn't want to live.
Seema: What do you mean you
don't trust her. Richa confessed everything yesterday. Sidhi was innocent, you
know that.
Kunal: No, not about that.
About Abhay. She had told me when she came here that Abhay threatened to kill
her Anand and that is why she married him. But I never believed that. I mean
Abhay's not that kind of person...
Seema: What! I knew there had to be a reason! But did you
ever try to find out. What if…
Kunal: I asked Anand. He
denied anything like that ever happened.
Seema: But he's just a
child. What if he didn't know what was happening? Look bhaiya, I know one
thing. Sidhi still loves you to her core. You're the only one she's ever loved.
So if she's saying something, she could be right. You have to try to believe
her.
Kunal: I don't know Seema.
I don't know what's right. The thought of her with Abhay, loving Abhay,
literally tortures me. But right now, I am scared of her. I dont want her to do
something silly. Let's find her.
Seema: Ok. I will look near
our house. Why dont you go check the temple. Maybe she went outside…
Kunal
rushed outside, and drove around looking for Sidhi. The morning hustle was all
around him, but nowhere could he find Sidhi. He checked the temple, the park,
and all other places he could think of.
Finally,
Kunal reached Powai lake, the place where both Sidhi and Kunal had often come
to drown their pain. He was relieved to see Sidhi sitting under a tree. But as
he approached her, he saw how strangely lifeless she looked. Something in Kunal
ached watching Sidhi like that.
Sidhi
wasn't crying. She wasn't thinking. She probably wasn't even aware of what was
going on around her. She just sat there, motionless, staring at nothing.
Suddenly Kunal wondered if she was alive. A chill ran through his spine and he
leapt to reach her. He touched her arm. She didn't move or respond in anyway.
"Sidhi"
Sidhi
didn't respond. Kunal shook her arm and Sidhi looked up, with a blank
expression. Kunal felt relief but was also perplexed to see the complete lack
of life in Sidhi's eyes.
"Sidhi,
come with me. I am sorry."
Sidhi
didn't move, but Kunal pulled her up and lifted her in his arms. She continued
to say nothing and stare at nothing even as Kunal took her to the car, drove
her home, even picked her up and laid her on her bed in her room. Wordless,
like a corpse, Sidhi lay there. Kunal covered her with a blanket and Sidhi
slipped into a dreamless sleep.
Kunal himself slipped into the couch, himself exhausted from
the events of the last 12 hours and dozed off. The house woke up around him,
but with the kids in school and everyone else engrossed in examining their own
actions and beliefs, nobody disturbed Kunal and Sidhi as they slept through the
day, tired with the weight of their lives.
It was evening by the time Kunal woke up. His drowsiness
disappeared the second he realized Sidhi was no longer sleeping on the bed, and
was replaced by worry. Just then Seema entered the room with a cup of tea.
Kunal: Sidhi. Where is Sidhi?
Seema: Don't worry, she's here. She's sitting outside. She
looks lost, and I don't know what to say to her. But she's here.
Kunal took the cup of tea and came out to see Sidhi, who was
sitting with her kids, but she wasn't really talking to them, or even listening
to what they were saying. As Kunal approached them, Sidhi got up and left,
before he could say anything. So Kunal also stopped right there, wondering what
to tell Sidhi.
The kids were talking to each other.
BA: Ma looks so sad today.
CA: Yeah, she didn't even react to my joke. Chachi said
she'd been sleeping all day because she was tired, but she looks so sad. Should
we tell papa? Is mom ill again?
BA: Maybe. Maybe she's just upset because of what happened
with Richa aunty yesterday.
CA: But she should be happy right. Papa threw Richa aunty
out and even slapped her.
BA: Yeah, I have always hated Richa aunty. I knew she had
caused our parents to separate. But I don't understand why Mom looks so
unhappy. The other day also, I saw her crying to herself. When she saw me, she
wiped her tears and pretended to laugh, but I know she was crying. Do you think
she is sad because we forced her to be here?
CA: No, I don't think so. I have always seen her crying,
though she does look very upset today. But even when I was at Abhay dad's
house, you know after Mom married Abhay dad, she was always crying in her room.
Either she would be alone in her room crying, or she would come and watch me
when I slept. She never spoke to Surekha
dadi or Abhay dad, or even went to their rooms. In fact wouldn't even let me go
to them. Sometimes I did, but sometimes
I listened to her because she looked so sad. Once I woke up at night and went
to her room, where she was crying loudly alone. I then went to Abhay dad's room
and told him that Mom was crying, but he asked me to ignore and I slept with
him. Do you think Papa also ignores Mom's crying? Papa does not love Mom,
right.
BA: No. Papa loves Mom. For so many years I have seen him
take Ma's name in sleep. He has never stopped loving Mom.
CA: Then why is this happening?
BA: I don't know.
(pause)
BA: Hey, did you pack for your athletics camp? You have to
go tomorrow evening right.
CA: No, Mom said she would pack my things. You know I am
going to beat everyone there.
BA: I know bro. You're the best. :D
CA: You're also going to Delhi tomorrow?
BA: No, day after tomorrow morning.
CA: Best of luck. You're a genius. I am sure you will win
the medal and it will be even nicer than Papa's gold medal.
BA: Ha ha. Nothing can be better than papa's gold medal!
Anand, we're both going to be away from each other. I will miss you
CA: I will miss you too bro. But it's only 2 weeks. We will
talk on phone daily and we will both win and come back home soon.
BA: Yeah.
CA: Yeah. But who will take care of Mom when we're gone? As
it is she doesn't eat and take her medicines when we are not around.
BA: (pauses to think) I will ask Seema chachi. I will make
her promise.
CA: Okay.
Kunal had been listening to his sons' conversation. Listening
to Sidhi's plight in Diwan house confused him more.
"So she did not live with Abhay, did not talk to him, and
was sad…"
Before Kunal's head spun, he remembered something important
he had to do. He went to Gaurav's room, where Gaurav, who had just come back
from work, was going to change clothes.
Kunal: Gaurav.
Gaurav: Haan bhaiya.
Kunal: I need to talk to you. Actually..
Gaurav: What happened bhaiya?
Kunal: Actually I needed 20000 rupees loan from you. I
promise I will give it back in a week. I have wrapped up two cases and their
payment is due. I just need some money for both my sons. Actually I had
arranged for BA's Delhi trip for the Olympiad, but now CA also needs to go to
the athletics camp tomorrow itself, and I need to pay the fee and get equipment
etc., so I am short of some 20000 rupees.
Gaurav: Don't worry bhaiya. I already paid both their fee
today, and was about to give you this…(takes out money)…this ticket for Anand
and this 10000 rupees for other expenses to you.
Kunal: Gaurav. Oh my God. You did this!
Gaurav: Yeah I didn't get a chance to tell you yesterday.
But, here, take the money, you can do the rest of the things tomorrow.
Kunal looked at his brother with pride.
Kunal: I don't need these. I have some money. And I will
have more by next week so I will pay you back. But I am so overwhelmed. Thanks
Gaurav. Thank you so much.
Gaurav: It's nothing. Actually bhaiya…
Gaurav was about to say something, then paused. Just then
Seema came from behind and spoke.
Seema: Tell him Gaurav. Don't worry about the promise. Tell
him.
Kunal: Tell me what.
Gaurav: Actually Bhaiya, Sidhi made me promise, but it was
actually she who gave me most of this the money yesterday, before the party. My
contribution is only rs. 10,000. The rest she gave. First, I refused to take
it, because I thought she brought the money from Abhay Diwan, but then she told
me she had been doing part-time legal consulting ever since BA's Olympiad exams
as she knew he would win. Yesterday she realized that the money would not be
enough for both BA and CA, but it would be still very important. So she asked
me to give this money to you without taking her name, because she didn't think
you would take it from her. She showed me her papers, so I believed her bhaiya.
But now I think…now I think you should know.
Seema: Haan bhaiya. Sidhi loves you and her children. You
should forgive her.
Kunal was shocked. He recalled the papers and the money that
had fallen out of Sidhi's bag when he had collided with her on the road, saving
her from the speeding car. Sidhi had been as aware of her children's needs than
he had been. He needed to act on his decision, and give life a chance with her.
Maybe things would be all right again. He thanked Gaurav, took the tickets and
left.
Kunal didn't get a chance to talk to Sidhi that night as she
had already slept and even the next morning as she was avoiding him and Kunal
had to go to work. He had already missed a day of work and both his current
cases were wrapping up soon. Also, his assistant had told him about a new case
that he really wanted Kunal to look at. It was an old murder case that had
never reached trial, and Kunal's assistant was insistent that he must look at
the case once, and only he could bring justice to someone innocent and wronged
for years.
Kunal got back home quite late that night. Sidhi was awake,
but there was no food on table and Kunal was a little surprised to see she
wasn't waiting for him. Instead she was packing. The kids were up; CA was about
to leave for the camp, and him and BA were helping her.
CA: Thank God papa you came back. I was waiting for you
only. I couldn't leave without seeing you no!
Kunal: Sorry beta, I got very late today. But now that I'm
here, come here give me a big hug.
CA hugs Kunal.
Kunal: Best of luck. Be a sport, and be fair to everyone.
Don't fight and don't get hurt ok.
CA: Come on papa. Mom already gave me a long lecture.
Kunal laughed. "Ok ok, my rockstar. Just have a blast, and
call me if there's any problem. Give your best and practice hard. I am sure you
will do very well."
BA: Come Anand, your bus is here.
As the three of them bade goodbye to CA, Sidhi turned her
attention to her elder son.
Sidhi: You also sleep baby. You have to leave early morning
for Delhi. I have already packed everything. Come.
BA: Ok ma. Good night. Good night papa.
BA went inside. Kunal looked at Sidhi. She still wasn't
looking at him.
Kunal: Aye, will I get some food today?
Sidhi didn't respond, but turned back to the kitchen and
heated up the food.
Kunal settled on the table and Sidhi started serving him. As
she finished, she turned back to go inside. Kunal held her arm and stopped her.
Kunal: And your food?
Sidhi considered not responding, but Kunal's grip on her
hand was firm. So she replied, " I am not hungry."
Kunal pulled Sidhi and made her sit. "Sit here and eat. You
will not eat and then fall ill and make me run around. Come here, eat."
Saying this, Kunal picked a spoon from his plate and took it
towards Sidhi's mouth to feed her, but she turned the other way. Kunal was
still holding one of her hands, so from the other hand she served herself a
little food and started to eat. Seeing this Kunal relaxed his grip and said
"Haan, it's fine. You're not a 3 year old kid that I will feed you."
But Kunal's antics did not meet with a response. They both
quietly ate, and then Sidhi went inside the room.
Kunal followed, to see Sidhi packing two bags. One, which
was BA's, was evidently done. Now she was packing her own clothes.
Kunal: What do you think you are doing?
Sidhi: I am leaving.
Kunal: Where?
Sidhi: I don't know. Both the kids are not here for the next
two weeks. So I am going away. I don't know where I'll go but I can't live
here.
Kunal: You are not going anywhere. Sidhi listen. Let's
forget the past. I trust you. I believe you. Just stay.
Sidhi: Really, you believe me? Do you actually trust me, or
are you just saying it? Do you really, in your heart, believe that what I did
was under force and not of my own accord and not because I didn't love you or
your children?
Kunal: Sidhi, let's not discuss this again. How does it
matter? I am sorry. I am tired. I don't know anything. All I know is I was once
happy with you and I want to be happy again. It's been really long.
Sidhi: No Kunal. It's not that simple any more.
Kunal: Why Sidhi? I told you I believe you. Let's forget
everything. It's okay.
Sidhi looked at Kunal, pain in her eyes: No Kunal. It's not
okay. You don't really believe me. You don't have full faith on me, with your
full heart. And until that trust is somehow restored, until that faith is back,
the love will not be true. And this will keep happening to us. Ten years back
it was Rohit and Richa. Three months back it was Abhay. Tomorrow it will be
someone else. Someone else will come and create misunderstanding between us and
I would again do something stupid and you would again lose trust on me. I don't
want to repeat my mistakes Kunal. I cannot bear getting united with you today
and getting separated again tomorrow because of some cruel twist of fate. If we
can't love each other beyond doubt, if we can't trust each other to the fullest
and stand by each other's side despite all odds, I don't want to be with you. I
want all or nothing now, Kunal. I don't have to strength to survive one more
ordeal without you!
Sidhi continued packing her bag. The silence in the room was
resonating in Kunal's heart, who didn't know what to say to Sidhi, but didn't
want to see her go.
Kunal: You're not leaving. You're not going anywhere. You
forgot the court order. You have to live here at least for another 3.5 months.
Sidhi: The same court order you tore and threw on my face?
Kunal had had enough. He held Sidhi by her shoulders and
made her look straight into his eyes, and said "You're not going anywhere."
Sidhi stared back. He couldn't read her eyes at all right now. "What do you want from
me Sidhi?" he shrieked.
"Ok Kunal I wouldn't go anywhere. Here's
what I want…all I want from you, Kunal, is a promise. A promise that you will
look after my children, no matter what happens and save them from every danger.
That you will be the father they deserve. That you will be the father they can
emulate one day. That you will protect them and keep them AWAY from Richa,
Abhay, Surekhaji, Thakral, and anyone else who threatens my children. Promise
me Kunal, that you will do that till your last breath."
Kunal was astonished. But he couldn't doubt the
truth, the purity in Sidhi's eyes at the moment.
"Ok. I promise."
Precap:
Kunal looked sympathetically at the demure
22-year-old sitting in front of him, crying.
"Sir, my father never got justice. He was
murdered and his case hasn't even come to trial in 17 years! And I saw him
being killed, with my own eyes.
For seventeen years I have not been able to
sleep sir. My mother died last year. Me and my brother, we couldn't save her.
She did everything to keep her alive, to educate her. She tried to get our
father's case opened but no lawyer listened to her. And my poor mother died
trying.."
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