Are men allowed to cry? - Page 2

Posted: 10 years ago
Originally posted by maha2us


This is an important topic. The society has somehow put a rule that men don't cry. We here from people saying 'men don't cry', 'big boys don't cry' etc. 
Men are expected to be tough and are expected not to tell their problems. And those men who cry are ridiculed even by other men and that man who is an object of ridicule could fall into depression. Because a man believes, he has to bury up his feelings, (And this belief is not conscious, but a subconscious belief), he finds there is a lot of anger within him which again is considered a taboo. He could be prone to depression. Again, it is difficult for a male to open up to a psychologist because he believes he is not to open up with his feelings. He considers something is wrong with him, if he opens up and tells he has some problems. Therefore, the number of males who commit suicide is much higher than the number of women.

When a man believes, the society expects him not to cry, he tends to be harsh on himself. One rule which applies for both men and women, if they have to improve themselves is they have to practice being gentle, tender, understanding and loving to themselves which becomes possible when they are able to accept their feelings. Is this all easier for women than for men? But those men who improved in life had been those who gave permission for themselves to cry.

 


👏👏

Men seem to have created a boundary for themselves. They always seem to be in an emotional fix without venting it out. Only if societies really didn't put such restrictions, I'm sure men would have loved to appreciate themselves even more.

Posted: 10 years ago
Originally posted by -Roshan-


. Only if societies really didn't put such restrictions, I'm sure men would have loved to appreciate themselves even more.

Who exactly is the society that is playing spoilsport here? Some outsider?
Posted: 10 years ago
Originally posted by maha2us



When a man believes, the society expects him not to cry, he tends to be harsh on himself. One rule which applies for both men and women, if they have to improve themselves is they have to practice being gentle, tender, understanding and loving to themselves which becomes possible when they are able to accept their feelings. Is this all easier for women than for men? But those men who improved in life had been those who gave permission for themselves to cry.

 
So what stops them?
Posted: 10 years ago
@Zorro: What stops them? Each person has to give his answer. Each person has to answer why he is not crying or why he is not expressing his feelings. Can you say why are some persons ashamed of their feelings? Why others are totally vulnerable?



Edited by maha2us - 10 years ago
Posted: 10 years ago
More than anyobody else. society norms and the orthodox thinking is responsible for this situation of 'Man' , that they even if want to cry or take out their pain from their eyes, they are considered as weak and what a better word to say - I'm not getting that particular word actually , but for changing this , a lot have said and written but nothing is been done in this issue.
Now the time has come when society needs to think that 'Man' also have heart and they also have emotions so why cant they freely express?

PS - Thanks for PM , Good topic, I'm in hurry, so will reply more later :).
Posted: 10 years ago
Last year I saw a serial which used to come in SP based on real stories.There a woman used to tell her son that " A strong boy does'nt cry" So he used to follow it.

Then he was ragged by some boys he never told about it to his parents and he could not even cry.He used to keep it within himself.Then at last he commited suicide.
Then his mother realised that boys should cry.
People say that those who cry they are weak,but actually the thing is TEAR MAKES US STRONG.

We feel more better.

All are not same,some people can handle all these and keep it within themselves and they forget about it.But some they get mentally frustated and may do some illegal things/commit suicide.

So it depends on that person.


-ddds
Posted: 10 years ago

Why wait for my reply? Ajnu is already speaking for me. Ask her all questions. She will answer for me. 😉 I kind of feel like Jesus now. WWRTHDO? 😆

 

Personally, I don't think there are any male or female qualities - just human qualities. I don't believe in gender stereotypes. All people feel hurt or sad. Everyone has the right to cry and express their feelings.

 

That being said any emotion shouldn't be overdone. People who cry at the drop of a hat are annoying. Get a grip people.  I also feel crying a personal emotion. Cry with your close friends and family. Don't bawl like a baby in public. When I see reality TV shows and see people shedding floods over some dumb reason - I want to go and punch them all in the face.

Posted: 10 years ago
There is nothing wrong with a man crying. If they feel the need to cry then they should.
Posted: 10 years ago
Originally posted by zorrro


Who exactly is the society that is playing spoilsport here? Some outsider?


Isn't society composed of dynamic elements from within? Outsider? No... That would be too specific. Peer pressure on how to act and behave is something that is slammed on the faces of both genders since the beginning of time. Take India, for example.

Why are women EXPECTED to compete with men? Why have women become competitive when dealing with the opposite gender? Why can't this aspect be tackled smoothly? Why the extra pushing and shoving? Who's to blame? Similarly, our society is structured in a fashion where rules are set forward for men too. Some prime lame examples would include men not acting weak by trickling their eyes, men not being able to express an opinion openly, and much more.

Who's to blame besides the society itself?!
Posted: 10 years ago
Originally posted by *Dev.*


More than anyobody else. society norms and the orthodox thinking is responsible for this situation of 'Man' , that they even if want to cry or take out their pain from their eyes, they are considered as weak and what a better word to say - I'm not getting that particular word actually , but for changing this , a lot have said and written but nothing is been done in this issue.
Now the time has come when society needs to think that 'Man' also have heart and they also have emotions so why cant they freely express?

PS - Thanks for PM , Good topic, I'm in hurry, so will reply more later :).


Thanks for stopping by, Dev. Great answer! 😃

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