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Posted: 9 years ago

                                

A girl is entering to the class-Room ... She is tall, she is sexy, she is of sound health, she has a sweat face... But she is not of my school she was from another one...  But what happen to me why am I talking about her from the beginning I hate girls but today I am in ... Is this love... Am I in love...?

                                                I am talking about the day I saw Elina 1st time ... It was the day of schooling and the occasion of the starting of a new class after the summer vacation...

                        Now I am is the door of a job after my UG ... Sill I can't remove out this these things from my mind and also from my life b'coz I love her so much and she become a sensitive part of my life from the day I saw her to... the day I die.

                                                        From the class 8 I love her but I feel the test of love in +2... when I was in binapani mess the Romantic  part of my love is in my everyday life diary which I can't publish it not only my romance with Elina but now that is the partner of my empty life...

                                                Now I am the age of 18 and I am committing suicide by drinking pesticide and thinking of the day of the 31st May 2010 the day of my first sex with Elina and all about all the romance I did with her ... But I was quite ...

Today and all the tears from my eyes trying to come out... I am sitting in the up stair of our home taking a butte of pesticide in my right hand and in another hand messaging to the brother of Elina...

                                I was in the bed Elina entered into my Room in mess there not a single men in the mess b'coz everybody had gone to their home coz the exam was over and we also came in and closed the door from our side we get locked from inside and I hold her tight... and hold her in my lap and asked her to lay in the bed was not so hot but we are. Then we started kissing each other but our leaps were so wet and our thoughts were thirsty ... Then I grab her back... Our breath was hot and speed was large... I started my hand do touch all over her body and she hold me tight that she can then we became silent and the thirsty parts of our body did their work after some things happened in us we felt us in the heaven and get us ready to go outside ... after all we were not in a position to look into each other's eye .. still I started to kiss her and help her to get dressed up and went her back to dress her hair by the way she was looking so sexy in open hair... that day we made a promise that we never leave each other alone in any moment ...

                                But today I am with a bottle of pesticide but she is not with me... A few days ago she react to my phone call very badly... and I had a break up ...

Finally I drank 10ml of pesticide at once and after a few second I drank 15ml more ... suddenly I felt my breath harder and my heart beat became faster finally I felt vomiting in the basing and   caught by my mother in a few second my papa's mobile got a phone call and I found myself in the local hospital... after some primary steps taken we run out for SCB Medical College And Hospital... On the way I got my co-sufferers crying... my papa was trembling ... one word was in his lip why should I did this... the day was long but the evening is closer to us but I was part of blind after anesthesia injected in the Emergency ward... after a saline water injected we were sent to the snake bite and Medicine PG ward for a long treatment of 11days...

                                                Out of 11 days I was senseless for 7days and my family and all my well-wisher were in a negative believe of my cure... My papa was all the time with me and with the positive thinking ... my maa papa was always with me but... i...

                                In the 7th day I was miming for maa to see her the next I got my sense back my mother was in front of me.. But unknowingly my eyes were wandering someone but she was not there... Still then I can't believe that she was not in mylife... In the 11th day I got my whole family around me but one character was missing ... Who I thought my whole family...

 

The day when I was returned from the gate of the death world, was not the happiest day for me ... B'coz I was still dead for someone and useless for myself the door of Xylo was open to me but I did not have able to get in finally another door open to me ... it was the door of my home ... Maa was in the door... I found a few drops of tear in my eyes entering into the room...

                                Today is about to 3yr to this incident but... I can't forgive me for this ... not only to me but also the girl who leave me alone in such a time... who break my heart and break the promise ... and I think I will never forgive even after my death...

                                                But something I want that is I want to forget everything and want to start a better life with Elina but I know this never happen... still I am living in this hope that she will be back... And I can write a story with happy ending...                                                                                                                                                                         

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