Discussion: Examples of love marriages.

Hey Guys!

This is the first time I am starting the official DOTW thread so please do participate in it! ;) heh. Today, we'd discuss if Love marriages work or not. You also have to give examples of the people you know who were in Love and after hard struggle and fights with parents, siblings.. they got married. :) and you have to tell if they are happily married or not.

My aunt's daughter had a love marriage.. which is NOT doing good now. They have only one kid. But I think that the reason behind their relationship not working is that.. they have financial problems and they always end up fighting about things like that.

My Mom's best friend had a love marriage.. Mom's friend and the guy she loved, had to argue a lot to their parents bec their parents were not allowing them to get married. The guy's parents said that the girl wasn't good-looking and same was the complain frm girl's side (For the boy, ofcourse!) But after great struggle, their parents agreed. And you know at this point of time (when your parents dun agree on gettin married to the person u love) you realize how much you love that person and how much that person loves you.

Because I have seen in many cases that the guy and girl end up losin their hopes and agreeing to their parents decision and break up with each other bec somebody told them to. I feel.. whatever the circumstances may be.. you should always stand by the person you love and you should try your hardest to make your parents agree or watever the hurdles are coming in between ur marriage.

Also, my mom's best friend's Parents said that the guy doesn't earn good and we can't let our daughter marry to a guy who is not very qualified and cannot earn good.

MashaAllah, today, my mom's best friend is settled in America with her husband. And that guy earns A LOT! They are very rich and are living a GREAT life. 😃 They still love and care about each other the same! 😳

So I guess.. it depends from person to person and their love. :S I know that you should stand by the person u love no matter what! Even durin the bad days of his life. Theres one sentence I'd like to quote, normally spoken by the Parents,

"Pyaar se pait bhar jaye ga tumhara? Paise nahi honge to kahan se pait bharo ge? Pyaar se? Phir humare paas mat lautna rote huey."

True though!! If you are married and the guy you love isn't earing good.. then is your love going to full your stomach? No! You need food to live, not love. I agree on this point with the Parents. But one should struggle and earn good if he really loves that girl who he claims to love!!! 😳

Please share your views on this!! 😳

And guys, this is just to inform you all that I'd be away from the forum for 2 months due to exams. So please cooperate with my viewbies and Anon (who will be very active here in my absence). Do not spam the forum and be a good bacha! 😃😆

OMG Shiza.. Tumhari aadat of long posts..😆 Haila.. Will edit my post after i read urs..😆

- To be edited.. - 😆 😆

OMG soooo log post,

Awesome DOTW. 😳

Will edit more later. 😳

But few words, I think itdoes depend on how strong your love is. Love Marriages do work, all the time. You see all them old couples in western societies that are married for 50 years + 😆

Yes you have to love in good times and bad times. Not just when the guy is rich, etc. 😳 The love has to complete and fill you up, so you ae not lacking something in the relationship that will break it.

If it is true love, stand by your Partner no matter what. If thayt is what both of you want.

Yes lots of times, they sacrafice for parents...but at least you should TRY!

Yes some Love Marriages do not work, but then that may be down to love -was no strong enough or therewas No honesty.

I feel that love - you need complete faith in the other and honesty in the relationship.😊

-Saira.

To be honest I don't believe in this stuff 😵😵 its too fake 😵 😕

but love marriages do work for SOME people 😆 😆 so let those people be.

wow...nice topic Shiza jee😊

well I agree with most of the points that u have stated...but parents are not always wrong...and they are not their child's enemy...to not let him/her get her/his love...they might have good reasons...

for example.. we go and fall in love with someone who is not from same religion as us...then it will cause som problems nah... and in this case I would be supporting the parents...that the marriage should not take place... because no matter what...we should keep in mind that we shouldn't hurt our parents...they have done a lot for us... we can't just hurt them and go for someone that we know for few months or yrs... I am not saying that we shouldn't try talking to our parents so they agree...but if they really say no...and we see that they might get hurt...then its better to leave the person u love than ur parents... for example if a guy go against his parents to marry me...I would think that if he left the parents that had done so much for him till him...that raised him...gave him love... then he could leave me one day for someone else... because if the did not cared about his parents...which are the most important people in one's life...then he could leave me anyday... u know what I mean...

so I say...when we r attracted to someone...or have a crush on someone...we should keep a few things in mind...like if this relationships turns into love...would my parents like him or not... only then we might be able to get both our love and keep our parents happy..😃

i don't have any love stories to share because NOONE has had a love marriage in my family..😆 not that i know of anyway. but all my friends parents (non desi) have had a love marriage.. n they are all very happy.. and together   😃 love marriage works for some, and for some it doesn't work.. but thats not because its a love marriage.. it doesn't matter if its a love or arrange marriage.. it all comes down to the couple... BUT if parents don't approve and the child hurts his/her parents n gets married.. i don't think they will have a successful marriage.. first of all, they won't have support from their family.. they won't have the "blessings" hehe... so if anything goes wrong.. they have to sort it out themselves.. also they will always think .. ohh why didn't my parents approve.. maybe there is something rly wrong in the guy.. they will always have this thought at the back of their minds.
n secondly, its karma.. u hurt ur parents.. u get hurt! thats what i think anyway lol
nice topic!
😃

Nice DOTW Shiza jaani! so this is the very first DOTW at this forum..? well then i must say it's a rocking DOTW!

Anyways coming back..well that was indeed a long post shiza and let me give my view ont hos topic too...

I think many love mariages do work out, but yet there are some which don't ..unfortunately..

And there are various reasons for the fact that those love marriages don't work out..

for example...getting married too soon, all in love and not really thinking abt leading a married life..together..
It's only when u live together that u get to know each other completely...and u know in most cases the problems start coming when u get to know each other's habits etc..

I think marriages..whether love or arranged work onLY if there is complete understanding, faith and honesty and love between the spouses..and also when u have the blessings of elders/parents/family etc...

*will edit*

LOve,
Gracella

interesting disscussion, truly marriages surviving now adays is alot less then before, be it arranged or love marriage.. its a fact... almost 50 percent of marriage are ending in divorce.. something to think about before you all tie the knot...

Personally i had a luv marriage and if your not ready to scrap the bottom of the barrel for your marriage do not and i mean do not get married, no matter how in luv you think you are, its not easy and all those really cute things that you just luved about your bf or gf turn into little annoying ticks in your marriage, furthermore the blinkers come off after your married litterally you see the light at the end of the tunnel, so if i scared any of you off from marriage well, that wasnt my intention i just want you girls to know that marriage is nothing but a whole amount of giving, and giving yes after giving some more, you then recieve a whole lot more in return...this is just my personal view on marriage...and the only thing i found that really works in any type of marriage be it luved or arranged is patience....

good luck...ladies...

robina

wowwwwwwwwww great post really loved it
i had a love marriage 12yrs back n we still r in love with each other but da fact which changed is dat we have matured a lot withe ach other in these years grow and lead life with full enthu is da afctw hich is needed da most in ones marriage may be it a love or arranged match ppl keep on thinking it will be da same as da first day but responsibilities come in our ways we grow and change so changes our lifestyle
da best thing to keep a marriage healthy and haoppy is trust compassion adn space whcih is very important even a small kid needs his or her own space so i feel we shud have dat kind of relationship