I WOULDN'T WANT MY GIRL TO BE OUT OF THE HOUSE AFTER 10 IN THE NIGHT
It
was my first meeting with this mainstream television actor and for some
strange reason I had anticipated him to be someone with a blustering,
boisterous and a pompous attitude, which is usually the case with most
celebrities. But I was surprised by his composed and unpretentious
persona, and almost corporate behaviour. After making me wait almost
endlessly for more than an hour, Romit Raj walked up to me with an
apologetic expression and tried to make up for the loss of time.
Paradoxically,
he is the blend of someone who is debonair, reserved and maybe even a
little unattainable and yet there is this surprising pleasant
cordiality that he exudes. But it isn't easy to get him out of his
comfort zone, as I realize it takes a bit of coaxing and cajoling to
get Romit to speak about himself.
Romit begins by tracing his
journey right from where acting for him started. "I always wanted to be
an actor. My parents enjoyed watching films and television. It always
brought a smile on their face. So I thought, why not become an actor?
Entertainment is a good industry where you not only get paid but people
come to know you also. So I found all that really exciting."
Modeling
for ads, Romit actually started his career in Kolkata and then came to
Mumbai, where he did serials like Phir Bhi and Shakalaka Boom Boom. He
got lucky when the producers of the movie Hum Dum saw him in Shakalaka…
and offered to launch him in Bollywood. The film, like most
experimental projects, bombed at the box-office as it didn't have a
snazzy star cast nor was it the launch pad of any star kid. Romit
recollects and retells the experience of his first Bollywood tryst.
"When
I read the script of Hum Dum, I found it to be a very nice love story.
So I did the film. But unfortunately, it wasn't marketed very well. It
didn't reach out to a larger audience, so it didn't do well at the
box-office." He was also part of another unsuccessful film, Yatra,
which too didn't help lift his career graph on the big screen.
But
life has a way of balancing the ups and downs for even the most unlucky
people. After a luckless stint in Bollywood, with television, Romit hit
the jackpot. After Phir… and Shakalaka… he did a few more shows like
Suno Har Dil Kuch Kehta Hai and today is finally doing two big shows
Maayka and Ghar Ki Lakshmi… Betiyaan.
But
it isn't Romit's film and television projects that draw my interest.
Drifting from the usual topics of career and professional talks, I dare
to tread on Romit's fiercely guarded private space.
Every
celebrity has two sides to him that is constantly under media scrutiny
– professional and personal. Today, actors are more often written about
for their personal lives than their professional achievements. But with
this actor, the case is different. Everyone knows about Romit's career
highs. Yet, it's not his films or his television serials that first
come to my mind.
Romit is young, famous, has two avidly
watched daily soaps to his credit and most importantly belongs to the
big bad world of television, but controversies still don't seem to come
his way! You never hear of a Romit Raj being involved in a brawl at a
nightclub or being spotted in public with another actress. He has
always kept a low profile and scandals have always kept away.
The
most conspicuous fact in Romit's life is the absence of that special
somebody and his unexplained bachelorhood status. Romit is single and
from what one hears, perhaps the reason is a heartbreak in the past; an
unfulfilled relationship. Long ago, when Romit was still in Kolkata, he
was seeing someone for almost eight years.
Unfortunately,
things didn't work out in their favour and they broke their
relationship. Today, that lady is married, settled and has kids, while
Romit is single but not yet ready to mingle. The first thought that
comes to my mind is, maybe he hasn't moved on. After all, an eight-year
relationship can never be easily forgotten. And then as they say, your
first love is always special.
I ask the very obvious question,
if Romit is heartbroken and disillusioned about love. Initially
reluctant to talk about her, Romit opens up a bit as he tells me that
he has left his past behind and has moved ahead. "I did move on. I was
seeing that girl when I was in Kolkata. We began dating each other in
school and then in college," he reminisces. Today, Romit is not in
touch with her. "She is happy in her life with her kids and all that.
In fact I am very happy for her and her family. She has got married to
a very nice man."
After the relationship didn't work out, Romit
decided to come to Mumbai and work out his career. Perhaps to get away
from the pain, he immersed himself in making a career for himself. And
anything remotely connected to dating or getting into a relationship
was out of the picture.
"When I came to Mumbai, my whole focus
was on getting work. It used to be very tough. There was no production
house or advertising agency that didn't have my pictures. I made sure I
applied everywhere. I was so busy that there was never any time to date
any girl. Then when I got work, due to the work commitments, there was
no time for any relationship. I came to Mumbai to make a name for
myself. I am here to do that," he says firmly.
Today, in the
television scenario, actors work almost 24 X 7 and land up spending
most of their time on the sets with their co-stars, which has resulted
in many of them dating one another. But Romit is one actor who is cut
clear when it comes to maintaining a strict line between his
professional and personal life.
"I don't want to see anyone
from the film or television industry. All the actresses are very nice
and sweet but I don't want to go around with any of them. What I want
to say is that, I don't want to eventually settle down with an
actress."
He even gives me reasons for the same. "I don't want
to get work home and talk about the same kind of stuff. I don't want
nautanki at home. At times I feel, like an actress might understand an
actor, but here in Mumbai, all girls are very hardworking, whether they
are doctors, lawyers, journalists or anybody for that matter. They
understand that they need to spend time outside for work purposes. So I
am sure any girl will understand my work as everyone knows how
stressful an actor's job is."
Romit continues in the same vein
and talks in detail as to why he wouldn't be seen in a relationship
with any actress. "To be very frank with you, I would not want my girl
to be out of the house after nine or 10 in the night. And as an actor,
you are required to do late night shifts. I would not like all that. I
want a housewife or if she wants to work, she can work in the day
time."
Romit might sound like the typical chauvinistic Indian
male when it comes to selecting his ideal woman, but thankfully, he is
honest and frank enough to admit what he expects from his woman and
relationship. "I believe that marriages should be perfect and somewhere
down the line, when people want to fall in love or want to get married,
they do make false promises. And all these promises shatter when you
start taking things for granted. I am one person who makes things very
clear right from the beginning."
So far, the actor hasn't yet
found the right lady. "I have been working, so it's been difficult for
me. I don't have the time to meet people from outside the fraternity. I
don't know if I will opt for an arranged or love marriage. My parents
are after me. Hopefully within two years I will get married."
He
may not know now if he will go for a love or arranged match, but he
does have a clear picture about what he will do if he ever falls in
love again. "For me it's very important to settle with the girl I am
going to go around with. It's not like 'I really like you, let's just
go around'. I personally feel that the day I fall in love, I am going
to get married to that girl."
After
a moment's thought, he adds, "I obviously have a lot of friends who are
girls. But I don't want to get into a commitment where I don't see
marriage happening in the future."
If there ever were any
regrets or hang ups, they all seem to have been washed away. "Life is
amazing," Romit says with optimism and when I roll my eyes for him
being so politically correct, he gives me a very stern look and offers
some serious advice. "Nothing in life is permanent. You go through
different phases in your life. Whatever happens to you happens for the
good.
This is actually true. There are a lot of things which
don't happen according to your wishes, but you can't help it. There is
a lot of difference between what you deserve and what you desire." It's
remarkable how even the simplest and smallest experiences of life can
mature a person and Romit seems to be one of those people who has taken
a lesson from it.
**BY PURVAJA SAWANT
-- k k rai
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